Nerding Out in Hobbiton by Tim Ghazzawi:
“I’m going on an adventure!” shouts Bilbo Baggins, map and knapsack in tow, as he flees from his home in the Shire and thus begins his quest alongside a band of quarreling dwarves to recover a something-something from an evil dragon. It’s been years since I’ve seen the movie(s) and even more years since I’ve read the book. So when I stepped foot into Hobbiton, the preserved movie set-turned-village, a sense of nostalgia for my nerdy literary childhood swelled within me. Visit the family farm outside of Matamata, New Zealand and discover 44 different hobbit holes embedded in the rolling green countryside. Each with a colorful circular door, some with laundry hanging from a line and smoke billowing from a chimney. There’s also a frog pond and lots of garden patches, the Green Dragon inn, and an old mill. It’s a proper village, Hobbiton, a truly immersive experience ruined only slightly by the countless tour buses and LOTR fans who flock to the site and geek out on the factoids served up by the enthusiastic tour guides.
If I had to pick a literary world to get lost in, maybe even live in, Hobbiton would be near the top of my list. As I discovered in real life, it’s a peaceful place, with friendly if not mischievous neighbors, and the chance to live a simple unassuming life. Hogwarts/Hogsmeade/London, of course, would also rank high, but only if I could be a wizard and friends with Harry or Hermione or at least Neville. Narnia? Maybe. Also magical but a strange place. And I’ve long had a weird desire to compete in the Hunger Games but, again, only under specific conditions: I have to win without outright killing anyone and return to Panem as a hero.
I have one month in New Zealand. Something I’ve noticed since beginning my travels here is that most backpackers I meet intend to stay here for a long time. To do so, they find work and I’ve met some as hostel staff, waiters, and lifeguards. With normal if not mundane daily tasks to keep them busy. I’ve seen flyers with adventurous job offerings, too. My favorites include: electric scooter repairman; skydiving video editor; and golf ball recovery snorkeler. I don’t think I’m that desperate to stay in New Zealand, though, just yet. That is unless Hobbiton has an opening for me. Not as a tour guide. I’m not that into the books. But as a gardener, maybe? Five full-time gardeners tend the grounds year-round. Or as a bartender at the Green Dragon, perhaps. I might even be open to playing a Hobbit if such an opportunity arises. Each of the hobbit holes is “themed” depending on the type of character who lives there. I toured the homes of a fisherman, a baker, and a cheesemaker. Maybe I could introduce lawn tennis as a thing, become the resident instructor. There’s also a village drunk, with bottles scattered about his front yard. Him. He would be fun to play. Bilbo eventually returns to the Shire after his many adventures. If I don’t, you have an idea of where to find me.
THE FACTS
I traveled to Hobbiton on a guided tour from Rotorua, where there’s also a Hobbiton Movie Set Shop. There are also round-trip tours available to/from Auckland. Given that hundreds of guests pour into Hobbiton every day, the ~two-hour tours run like well-oiled machines, from the bus journey and throughout your walk around the grounds, finishing with your drink-of-choice in the Green Dragon.
